Honesty Causes Fewer Wrinkles
By Written by a member of one of our sites, Fri Dec 9th
Honesty Causes Fewer Wrinkles Have you noticed that though many of our relationships start outwith such promise, something often happens, causing them toquickly go downhill? Perhaps you’ve seen friends wondering aboutsomeone they've spent time getting to know, only to find outthat person was less than completely honest with them? For the most part, we all start with the best intentions ofmeeting someone, pursuing a fun friendship that leads to a lightromance that may someday culminate in the love of our life. Butit doesn't always work that way, does it? Sometimes it doesn'teven get as far as meeting in person. And what is the culprit?In many cases, honesty, or the lack thereof. Someone isn't quitetelling the truth about who they are, what they are doing, orwhy they act the way they do.
In online dating, we need to be especially diligent in helpingfight the dishonesty battle. That’s because all an onlineacquaintance may know and understand about you for some time iswhatever you decide to reveal to that person. We need to becarefully and gently honest. No one wants to get involved with atoo zealously honest brute or brutesse. But most of us have alow tolerance for dishonesty. The dishonesty can range from ourdescriptions of who we really are, to how many potentialpartners are being pursued at the same time, to lies for noapparent reason. Every person wants to put his or her best foot forward. Butplease, make sure it’s the foot attached to your own leg! Iheard one woman say a suitor told her that he “owned a textilebusiness.” In reality, he delivered paper towels. We all wish tobe seen in the best light possible for as long as possible, butearly in dating and throughout the relationship we should begetting to know each other as we really are. When we’re dishonest, whatever the reason may be, it narrows ourpath. We then have to remember the lie and try to conform to it.We are less “free” with our loved one than before telling thelie. The side effects of the lie are almost
always fatal to therelationship, and, it’s just wrong. The listener takes in thelie and very often recognizes it instantly for what it is. Toavoid giving offense, they won't call their friend on thedishonesty. If they did, the relationship would end instantly,because who wants to date someone that has called them a liar?But left unaddressed, it’s like a pebble in a pair of runningshoes. The shoes should be ready for the long run, but knowingyou’ve been lied to irritates and agitates. Even if the lie isn’t caught, the ‘lied-to-loved-one’ feelssomething shifting—the one we care about slowly slipping away,and we’re left to wonder why? What happened? Relationship decaybegins. The end is coming because a lie indicates a lack ofrespect, which will most likely be repeated. This is a fatalcycle, and it's killing relationships that begin with realpotential. And regarding our appearances, the “Glamour Shots” and the7-year old pictures need to be updated. Don’t we all want anddeserve someone who accepts us as we are, so we can gracefullyget on with the processes of life, feeling loved as years go by? If you're stretching the truth, maybe it’s time to ask yourselfwhy you are doing this? Are you wasting your own and others’time and money dating when you’re not emotionally ready? And, hey, did you know honesty can actually be better forappearances too! Did you know it takes 300 differentwrinkle-forming muscles to frown through a lie, while it onlytakes ten to smile and tell the truth? We might just findourselves in healthier, happier relationships with a minimum ofadditional effort. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Visit www.metromingle.com today to meetlocal singles in your area in a clean and wholesome environment.http://www.metromingle.com/ About the author:Author submitted this article to use to use |
